Titled “Past or future, it hurts. Stay in the present!”
Rumor of what actually happened then continued over the last two weeks. It provided the additional wind to blow the untruth to his listening ears. The complaint, which already hurt him earlier, continued with added hurtful feeling now. It’s as if a sharp shining knife slices slowly at his brain. Afterall, it’s now recorded in written form where colleaques had a chance to view the full content of the complaint. As expected doubts on his integrity creeped in at different angle, different level and different voices. There’s no way that the rumor is going to stop except to be given the opportunity to clarify. Another thought came and struck him that prior to this event, he had another complaint two months back. Again, back then, it was also another misunderstanding. He suffered at the thought of what colleaques and fellow working friends would be thinking.
He shake his fist now when he remembered how he had provided his best counselling skill to help the students in both cases. He further suffered when he forecast what will happen to him if his superior do not believe him but instead stand on the side of the complainant. He cried quietly when privacy present itself. A short minor relief. He faced the possibility of being doubted at work. “Will I be sacked?” he thought. Such thoughts replayed itself so often over the last few days. Panadol brought temporary relief to his headache and stress. He tried to assure himself that his conscience is clear but it helped only for that moment.
If only he knew that thinking about the past, where it’s not real anymore, he will suffer. Thinking about the future, where things are not real yet, he too will suffer. If only he knew that to be focused on the present moment is the only way for spontaneous peace of mind. The event, is already past, a passing phase and what happened is gone. In short, be mindful of the present for peace of mind.